Chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but it takes six visits
Only one but it takes six visits
How Many???
- Thread starter prlyles
- Start date
How many statisticians does it take to change a lightbulb ?
One -- plus or minus three
One -- plus or minus three
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but the lightbulb has to really want to change
One, but the lightbulb has to really want to change
How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE? Because no one
else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even
know the bulb is BURNED OUT. They would sit in this house in the
dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it
out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact
that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS. But
if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS
LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on
to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND
UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY?! BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS... I'm sorry...what did you ask me?
One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE? Because no one
else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even
know the bulb is BURNED OUT. They would sit in this house in the
dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it
out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact
that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS. But
if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS
LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on
to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND
UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY?! BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS... I'm sorry...what did you ask me?
How many liberals does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One liberal and twenty eight delegates representing all the social, economic, and ethnic communities.
How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Twelve to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old bulb
One liberal and twenty eight delegates representing all the social, economic, and ethnic communities.
How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Twelve to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old bulb
...days will @chick_bleeds_carolina_blue be gone the next time she announces she is leaving?
No seriously, it's a question.
No seriously, it's a question.
how many stories did lochte and his speedo bro's go over in their heads before claiming they were robbed?
Block me. It's obvious you do not like me at all. Just ignore me or whatever it is we can do to not see messages from those who irritate us.
I gotta say you are ruining my love for Silvio! Since I am so bossy, change your avatar to something more suitable for you... like this:
Fatalist does it take to change a light bulb?
What difference does it make, it's just going to burn out again anyway.
What difference does it make, it's just going to burn out again anyway.
Dook basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?
One, and he gets three credits for it.
One, and he gets three credits for it.
You are off course again, I didn't say anything about you being bossy. But I'll play along. Since you've given us so much play-by-play of your life, shouldn't you change your avatar to:
You are off course again, I didn't say anything about you being bossy. But I'll play along. Since you've given us so much play-by-play of your life, shouldn't you change your avatar to:
I think I see where this disconnect is.... you took me saying "SINCE I AM BOSSY..." as being "Since YOU SAY I am bossy...." I have been trying to figure out how you guys twist everything I say around and I think it is you simply cannot read well. I forgive you. If you want to brush up on your grammar, give Strum a ringy! He is proficient in grammar..... and THAT is a very attractive trait for a man to have, so you might want to please your wife for a change! LOL
oh and I do love the picture above of you dressed in drag.... you clean up nicely!
*disclaimer- I am half-way joking on this one '92 lol
Ok just so I stay with you, since you're all over the place here as usual, it's my grammar now? Not my inability to read well? And on that topic, you didn't say "SINCE I AM BOSSY..." You said, "Since I am so bossy, change your avatar to something more suitable for you..." See you were talking to me there. So yeah, you'll forgive me if I continue to think you talk too much about things (even the simple stuff) you don't understand.
I am now convinced more than ever that '92 and chick are doomed to marry.
Only married folks can argue as much as you two, lol. I keep seeing the parents on "Everybody Loves Raymond".
you really don't get it do you???? I was telling you what to do because I am bossy, not because you said I was! Of course, I was speaking to you there. If I meant anything remotely close to YOU saying I am bossy, I would have said "Since YOU say I am bossy....." It's clear as a bell to me! I know it's five o'clock somewhere, but please! lol
Put your head on straight this time and think! And yes, you need to learn to read well and have better grammar.
BOTH That really is not all over the place, but I suppose I will slow it down for you, since you seem to have a comprehension disability.
I could handle Frank Barrone! LOL I loved him!
I know I am a pain in the butt on here sometimes, but I really am sweet to people in person! I just avoid people like him in real life because I know that it would not be happening for either of us!!! I had a date with someone who liked Trump WAYYYYY too much, so I told him we could probably only be friends. Well, now of course, he thinks I am a beotch but whatever. I don't like wasting time anymore with fellas... no reason to at this age.
I should stop wasting time arguing with 92, 71, GSD and heelman58.... they are a bit much!
Nice stretch, but no, it's not clear. I mean I get you think it's clear, but given your body of work here, I doubt there is much clarity in your life. Your poasts read like Nigerian email scams at best. Hell, I shouldn't be down here on your level anyway, but you make it so tempting. I have a weak spot for the handicap amongst us I guess.you really don't get it do you???? I was telling you what to do because I am bossy, not because you said I was! Of course, I was speaking to you there. If I meant anything remotely close to YOU saying I am bossy, I would have said "Since YOU say I am bossy....." It's clear as a bell to me! I know it's five o'clock somewhere, but please! lol
Put your head on straight this time and think! And yes, you need to learn to read well and have better grammar.
You should have just stopped with, "I know I'm a pain in the butt." For someone who doesn't like to waste time with others you seem to do a lot of it. Your hostility here has earned you everything you don't like to hear.I could handle Frank Barrone! LOL I loved him!
I know I am a pain in the butt on here sometimes, but I really am sweet to people in person! I just avoid people like him in real life because I know that it would not be happening for either of us!!! I had a date with someone who liked Trump WAYYYYY too much, so I told him we could probably only be friends. Well, now of course, he thinks I am a beotch but whatever. I don't like wasting time anymore with fellas... no reason to at this age.
and yet you cannot stop responding LOL ahhhhhhhhhh you must be a barrel of fun to hang out with----- said no one ever!
The irony of this is lost on you? Seriously. And no, I'm not going to stop skull dragging you around this forum just because you do not like it.
How many memes that make Chick lose her cookies can OOTB participants post in one day?????
There is that grammar we talked about.LOL... go ahead, I've been hearing laughing my butt off, buckwheat!
typos are fun..... My brain is exhausted from all these prostatectomies and laminectomies I've had to think about and correct allllllll day! I'm having brain mush right now, sorry.
That's likely a permanent condition for you.
How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?
Charismatic: Only 1, hands are already in the air.
Pentecostal: 10, one to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
Presbyterian: Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic: None, candles only.
Baptists: 15, One to change the bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.
Episcopalians: 3, One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.
Mormons: 5, One man to change the bulb and four wives to tell him how to do it.
Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your life journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.
Nazarene: 6, One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Lutherans: None, Lutherans don't believe in change.
Amish: What's a light bulb?
Charismatic: Only 1, hands are already in the air.
Pentecostal: 10, one to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
Presbyterian: Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic: None, candles only.
Baptists: 15, One to change the bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.
Episcopalians: 3, One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.
Mormons: 5, One man to change the bulb and four wives to tell him how to do it.
Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your life journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.
Nazarene: 6, One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Lutherans: None, Lutherans don't believe in change.
Amish: What's a light bulb?
How many a-holes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in. The second one to kick the chair out from under the first one and the third to stand, point and laugh at them him!
(a.k.a. GSD, UNC92 and UNC71)
Oh wait I meant FOUR..... heelman58 to stand there and tell them they are doing it all wrong!
Three. One to screw it in. The second one to kick the chair out from under the first one and the third to stand, point and laugh at them him!
(a.k.a. GSD, UNC92 and UNC71)
Oh wait I meant FOUR..... heelman58 to stand there and tell them they are doing it all wrong!
7/10. Solid.
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