Gimme your best yo momma jokes
- Thread starter Grayhead
- Start date
Yo mama so fat, she wore a Malcom X jacket and a helicopter tried to land on her back.
Yo mama is so black, when she gets out of the car, the oil light comes on.
Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing.
Yo mama so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing.
I'm a fan of terrible "yo momma" jokes, so here is my favorite one I've ever heard. First, a little context. This was about 8 or 9 years ago. I was in high school at Boy Scout summer camp, and our troop had been telling yo momma jokes all week. So we were sitting around, and the two kids who were the worst at telling these jokes start having a yo momma contest. One of them was very socially awkward, so he's trying to be confident in telling these jokes but falling way short. The other kid is a country boy who talks like Forrest Gump. So I'm just being the "hype man" for these terrible jokes, acting like they are the best ones of all time, jumping around and going "OOOOOOOHHHHH, HE GOT YOU DUDE!" for both sides. So, the one who talks like Forrest Gump says the following joke, which is my favorite to this day (I'll try my best to type it as he said it). "Your momma is so stupid...when she asked for directions to the stupid contest...they said...'Sorry....Can't tell ya!'" Just how he delivered that joke coupled with the complete screw-up of the punchline made it my favorite yo momma joke of all time.
Yo mama is so fat that she has more Chins than a Chinese phone book!
Yo mama so dumb, she told me to meet her at the corner of walk and don't walk.
Yo Momma is soooooo fat, she wore a yellow raincoat, and 15 kids tried to ride her to school.
Not a your momma joke...but seriously I laughed my fool head off at this commercial the first time I saw it!!!
Your mama is so fat her belt size is equator.
Your mama is so dumb that when she went to see a movie that said under 18 not allowed, she went and got 17 of her friends.
Your mama is so fat she went to the sizzler and got a group discount.
Your mama is so dumb that when she went to see a movie that said under 18 not allowed, she went and got 17 of her friends.
Your mama is so fat she went to the sizzler and got a group discount.
your momma is so ugly she robbed a bank with no gun just stuck her head on the counter and said put the money in the bag. one of the best commercials ever...
Yo momma so ugly, when she goes into a strip club they pay her to keep her clothes on.
Just listened to this album the other day. This might be the 6th best song on there, only for its comedic value.
Totally agree. Bizarre Ride is probably a top 10 rap album of all time for me. But that song is funny every time I listen to it. "yo momma got the wooden leg, with real feet" - I mean,...that's gold.
Yo mama so poor she eat cereal with a fork to save milk.
Yo mama so fat she walked in front of the TV and I missed three episodes.
And here I am again to screw y'all up and piss you off by going "off topic" sorta.... hahahahahahaha
How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
Four guys watching a football game.
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals."
What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift to women?
Exchange him.
How can you tell when a man is well hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
Why do little boys whine?
Because they are practicing to be men.
How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
Four guys watching a football game.
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals."
What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift to women?
Exchange him.
How can you tell when a man is well hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
Why do little boys whine?
Because they are practicing to be men.
